Being positive can also be…. toxic?

Being happy is a good emotion, but it’s not the only emotion we have. Sure, we all want to be stress-free and optimistic all the time, but if you excessively focus on the good side of things, you might be engaging in toxic positivity.

This phenomenon occurs when positive thinking is used to avoid, suppress, or silence negative emotions, instead of addressing and understanding them.

Here’s how toxic positivity can affect the way you think or the way you interact with others:

1. Ruins relationships
When you consistently insist on a positive outlook, you might invalidate others' feelings and experiences. For instance, telling someone "just stay positive" when they share their struggles can make them feel unheard and unsupported. Over time, this can lead to strained or broken relationships, as people may feel they cannot be honest about their emotions around you.

2. Suppresses emotions
Constantly pushing away negative feelings in favour of a positive façade can lead to emotional suppression. This can have detrimental effects on your mental health. Suppressed emotions don’t just disappear; they often resurface in unhealthy ways, such as increased stress, anxiety, or even physical health problems. Acknowledging and processing all emotions, both positive and negative, is crucial for emotional well-being.

3. Creates unrealistic expectations
Perpetuating the idea that one should always be positive sets an unrealistic standard for yourself and others. Life is a mixture of highs and lows, and expecting constant positivity can lead to disappointment and self-criticism when you inevitably encounter difficulties. This can create a cycle of guilt and frustration, further impacting your mental health.

4. Hinders authenticity
Authenticity requires embracing the full range of human emotions. When you engage in toxic positivity, you may start to lose touch with your true feelings and experiences. This can result in a disconnection from your true self, as you prioritise appearing positive over being genuine. Authentic relationships and personal growth thrive on honesty and vulnerability, which are stifled by toxic positivity.

5. Impedes problem-solving
Negative emotions often serve a purpose. They’re like a signal that something is wrong and needs attention. By ignoring or dismissing these feelings, you may overlook important issues that require resolution. Embracing all emotions allows you to address problems head-on, leading to more effective problem-solving and personal growth.

The key takeaway is not to stop being positive, but rather to recognise and embrace all your emotions. Both good and bad feelings need to be acknowledged and processed. This approach helps you navigate and move forward from various situations effectively.

Remember, it’s okay not to be okay sometimes.

Photo by Tasha Kostyuk on Unsplash.