Never happy with your achievements? You might be caught in the overachievement trap!

Do you feel that no matter what or how much you’ve achieved, it’s never quite enough? Or that when you’ve reached one goal, you don’t celebrate it but instead mull over how you could do better. Are you constantly giving yourself goals – whether at work or personal – only to feel like you’re never good enough to achieve any of them (even though you have!).

Watch out – you might be stuck in the overachievement trap. It’s common these days, especially when we have social media with all that “Look what I did today!” posts of peers celebrating their wins and achievements while you just scroll on. With all that constantly bombarding us, it’s easy to see why you would feel down, wondering if you’re falling far behind in terms of achievements.

Then there is the pressure to push yourself – first at school to get all As, then at college to have the best scores, and then now at work, to get a promotion/raise/new job etc. You think that when you achieve all of that, you’d be content.

The sad truth? You aren’t! Even when you’ve accomplished your goal, that sense of gratification quickly fleets away. Instead, you’re thinking, “What’s next?”

Why is this the case? Blame it on our need to prove our worth. After all, who doesn’t ever feel like they need to show that they can do it, and they can do it well. Whether it is making good grades or winning awards, we all yearn for praise, rewards and approval. It’s human nature after all. But this can soon result in feelings of insecurity when you feel like you’re not doing enough.

That need to constantly push ourselves through our achievements can often leave us feeling unfulfilled too. The worst part? You don’t celebrate your well-earned accomplishments – which is what you should be focused on instead! This feeling of being trapped to constantly achieve also distracts you from pursuing more authentic and motivating goals that support what you really want to achieve. Instead, you’re just setting yourself up to do, do and do more without stopping to realise why you’re doing it all for.

In the end, it only makes you feel like your work and self are never quite good enough. Plus, with that constant overachieving, it can leave you feeling drained, overwhelmed, and exhausted as you keep up with your own high expectations.

How to break free from the overachievement trap and that feeling of not being happy with your achievements? Change your mindset! Here are a few things to consider:

#1 Don’t just make it about achieving. Make it about the process!
Sure, it feels great to finally hit the jackpot. But take the time to understand that the real joy should come from the process of working towards something. This is a pre-goal positive effect where your happiness increases as you work towards your goal. When you focus on this, you’ll come away being grateful and thankful for the whole journey, and that is bound to make you appreciate how far you’ve come.

#2 Celebrate the small victories, not just the big ones!
Recognise and celebrate each milestone you’ve achieved, no matter how small. Want to run a marathon? Acknowledge each time you’ve passed a goal that works towards the 42.5km run. Hit your first 21km during training? Give yourself a treat! This practice will help you acknowledge the process and boost your motivation to keep going so that when you’ve hit that final goal, all that happy feeling will come flooding in!

#3 Set realistic goals and expectations
Avoid setting overly ambitious goals that may be difficult to attain. Instead, set goals that still challenge you but are within reach. This allows you to experience success more frequently and reduces the likelihood of feeling dissatisfied with your achievements.

#4 Change your mindset to “hey it’s good enough!”
View every achievement as an opportunity for personal growth and learning, not for flexing on social media! Express gratitude for your achievements, for being given the opportunity to chase after your goals. This fosters a positive mindset and helps you see the value in your efforts, promoting satisfaction with your accomplishments.

Photo by Jelly Dollar on Unsplash.